Written Reflection One

A virtue I learned about from the children at Step by Step

Within this twenty-first century world dwells a generation of skeptics. From hard-knuckled business climbing ruthlessly to the top of the corporate ladder to students competing in the ring of academic success, many today have grown numb to belief and loyalty. We are harsh critics of others, and our minds, cultivated in the eras after the Enlightenment, always desire empirical evidence before embracing belief.

Yet there is an innate part of human nature that longs to trust. We all crave acceptance, to belong to a group and to entrust ourselves to them. During my first night volunteering at Step by Step, I saw this truth about human nature illustrated from the moment I walked in the door.

When I arrived, I received an assignment to work in the three and four year olds’ room, to watch and care for those children while their mothers participated in a Bible study and fellowship time. Within the first ten or fifteen minutes, I noticed a little Hispanic girl entering. She seemed anxious, and clung to her mother’s side. I went over to her and began to engage her in conversation, beckoning her to come play with us. Despite her reluctance, I managed to convince the shy little girl to come sit in my lap and watch the others play.

For several minutes she sat quietly, clearly a bit overwhelmed by the rambunctious children. I knew that I needed to help her feel comfortable, to win her trust in this new and strange environment. I snagged some matchbox cars, and began to roll them up her arms, making racecar noises. She looked up at me, and her eyes met mine. After a evident internal debate, she let go of her inhibitions, relaxed in my arms, and grinned jubilantly. She had decided to trust.

The rest of the night we played happily together. She pulled me along as we did each activity, begging to sit in my lap again, to play baby dolls with me, to hear my clap of approval when she went down the slide. I helped her with her craft, explained the Bible story to her, and played with her in the playroom we went into. Before she left, she gave me a huge hug and again gave me that trusting smile.

Despite her rough background—a teenage mother, chaotic home life, and childhood likely characterized by transition—this young girl had swiftly trusted. She longed to believe, to entrust herself to another for acceptance. Though she probably had every reason to remain within herself, she gave in to her nature that compelled her to believe and trust.

This ability amazed me with its power and beauty. It is human nature to believe, and ultimately this cannot be suppressed, despite a skeptic culture. The powerful force of trust can build community for single mothers who have none, bring a smile to a child’s face, and draw people together, both in their humanity and ability.

Initial Reflection

By:  Kati Sandum

Step By Step is a faith-based organization that seeks to assist  single mothers by providing child-care for them once every two weeks. It provides them with transportation to and from a church, with a meal, and with a chance to escape their children and talk to each other for a couple of hours. The mothers, ages 14-24, often have limited opportunities to make meaningful friendships. Step By Step allows them to connect with each other and helps to link them to other programs that allow them to get their GED's, attend college, and get jobs. Step By Step is centered on God. The ultimate goal of its programs is to help young women form a relationship with Christ, yet this goal is not to be forced upon any woman. No matter what a woman has done, Step By Step aims to support her.

To prepare for watching children ages 0-5+, volunteers, including me, gathered and underwent training for about two hours. Based on this training, I expected swarms of kids to come  acting like wild monkeys. We were taught what to do if children refuse snacks, throw temper tantrums, or start sobbing uncontrollably. All of this training made me a little bit nervous. What if every child’s goal in life was to drive the workers crazy?

Volunteers practice discipline techniques at training

Thankfully, the actual experience was nothing like this. I worked with the 5 and up age group. At first we wondered if any children would show up - a bus was running late, so no one came until ten minutes after the purported start time. Only two girls came, but they bubbled over with enough excitement to fill the room. They drew pictures on the chalkboard and showed off dance moves that could beat any celebrity’s. Beyonce was their favorite artist, although they were also delighted to show us how to “whip nae nae”. When we took them outside to the playground, they played tag and red light green light until we were exhausted. They colored pictures and gave them to us.

Drawings that the girls gave me

I was most impressed by the girls’ vitality despite their circumstances. They don’t have all the advantages that I had. My parents and family work together to support me and help me grow, but these girls’ mothers had no support system to fall back on. Despite this, they taught their daughters to dance beautifully, to live happily, and to be friendly and polite. Step By Step is helping these and other girls to grow up with some support. I am glad that I will be able to help provide support to these girls and their mothers, and I am sure that they will continue to remind me not only of the importance of resiliency but also of the joy that can be found in every situation.

Initial Reflection

Initial Reflection -- Step By Step

Volunteering has always held a special place in my heart. Volunteering that involves children makes it even more dear. Maybe it's the added pressure of knowing that you're influencing those children with everything you do or that you're impacting them so heavily, but it just adds to the depth of the service for me. Working with children also just provides this light, no matter if you're performing a service or if you're just passing through a park, that provides this energy and love and warmth throughout the body.

I came in to CIS a little wary. English classes have never been my strong suit. However, my opinion was instantly changed upon hearing that we would be participating in service-learning. My excitement grew even further seeing that some of the organizations we were working with involved children, and I was lucky enough to get my first choice with Step By Step.

Step By Step is a wonderful organization that currently helps out around 120 single mothers and over 300 children. They meet every other Thursday night and, while volunteers like myself watch the children, the single mothers are put into groups and counseled and loved on. Step By Step provides guidance and helps these women empower themselves by giving them a foot forward and a helping hand where they previously didn't have one. So, contrary to my prior belief, Step By Step is a program more so for the mother's than for the children. And what a successful program it is. 

I went to my first meeting two Thursdays ago and it met every positive expectation I'd had and then some. That particular time, I was so pumped to have the privilege to work with the smallest of the children. That's right: babies. One even fell asleep in my arms for a solid half hour. How much more therapeutic can you get? Talking to the moms both before and afterwards was also a lovely experience. You could tell just from their demeanor and something about their eyes that they had been through a lot, but the love for their child shone through the most, and it was heartwarming. 

I can't wait to go back this week and see what Step By Step has in store for everyone. I'm hoping as we go along that I can maybe make some better connections with the mothers or just get to talk with them more and know some of their stories. Either way, I know that I'm going to benefit largely from this service, and from more than just getting to hold babies for two and a half hours (but c'mon... taking care of babies is still pretty awesome).

Initial Reflection

by: Phyllis Elizabeth Holloway

When going through a tough time in your life, you are to take it, "one step at a time." In other words, you take it Step By Step. The organization I am working with has already affected me in a way I did not see possible. Just a few minutes into the orientation I knew I was going to be forever changed and have a new perspective on what it is really like to be a mother. I realized my life has been nearly perfect even when things have not always been so flawless. These women have it tough. This is not just a babysitting program, this is a ministry for the bettering of mothers who just need a little help to see just what they are capable of. After Step By Step was established in 1995, it began providing a place where women could come to have community with other young mothers.

Volunteers at Step By Step getting to know one another
during the first day of orientation.
photo credit:
 Here's the link!

These mothers don't have the childhood graces like other young ladies our ages do. This program provides these young women friendships, mentors, meals, and time. Not only does this organization provide meetings every other week, they provide mentoring throughout every day and continuously stay involved in each of the young women's lives. We learned that many mothers and children that had been involved in the program continue to come back and volunteer later in their lives. The strength that this group of people have shown me has already pulled on my heartstrings.  

Step By Step from Laurie Cobane on Vimeo.
This video is about Step By Step's first meeting.

I am not a young mother, so I cannot truly comprehend what these young ladies go through on a daily basis. Through them, I hope to gain an even newer sense of what strength is. I hope to make friendships while learning skills that will continue to benefit me for the rest of my life. I also hope to continue to remember what being a kid is like. During my first day of volunteering, the children wanted me to go through the caterpillar tunnel with them. It was a very similar situation as shown in the video below. I wasn’t sure I was going to fit… Or how I would even begin to get back out of the tunnel, but I did it for the sake of seeing the children’s faces light up. I didn’t get stuck, but I can imagine that would have simply made them laugh just a little bit more. 

This program shows these young women they do not have to give up, and that they have what it takes to succeed. Not only do they encourage these ladies, they give them the resources they need to change their lives. By bettering the mothers we are bettering the children’s lives. It’s simply amazing what this organization is capable of. I am looking forward to having real talks with these women, and about playing with their children. I hope I am allowed to bless these children and women as much as I feel they have already begun to bless me.

 

My Initial Reflection

The Step By Step Logo of a mother and her child pointing toward a cross with a heart in the background and a little boy praying over his food.

My Initial Reflection

By: Cara Cox

          Step By Step is an amazing organization and I cannot wait to work with them during this semester. This organization works with young single mothers and helps them to care for themselves and their children.  It provides a place of support for these women and gives them the confidence and encouragement to succeed and have an amazing future.  Raising children is not easy and being young and single makes it even harder.  Coming to these meetings gives the mothers a time to relax and forget about their worries for a while.

          Step By Step meets every other Thursday for two hours.  While here, the members can talk about their struggles or joys and receive advice or comfort.  This organization is based in Christian faith and uses this faith to help guide and comfort these women and their children.  There are many more activities and services that this organization provides, such as bible studies and retreats, but I will be helping with the meetings.

           While I am volunteering for this organization I will be able to care for the children while their mothers are at their meeting.  Having an opportunity to let someone else look after their children gives the mothers a break to do something fun and think about themselves.  I hope I will be able to make a close connection with the children and help them have a good experience during their time at Step by Step.   I want to be able to give these children something to look forward to every other Thursday.

           During my time working with this organization, I hope to learn how to put others first.  I want to be able to incorporate my Christian values into my volunteering experience.  I want to be able to give my time and talents to this amazing organization.  I have been blessed to have had a very good life, so I want to be able to help those who may not have had all the opportunities I have had.

          After volunteering for the first time, I am so excited to go back and continue working with the children.  They are so sweet and after leaving I felt good, having helped out and given the mothers and the children a little break from their average day.  I felt that what I was doing was valuable because I was not only able to help others, I was helping myself.

Initial Written Reflection - Julia Palomino

Retrieved from: https://d1byvvo791gp2e.cloudfront.net/public/assets/media/images/000/331/274/images/size_550x415_youtube%20cover3.png?1383674329